The Beginning

There are so many wonderful blogs I have read and kept up with that gave me the strength to become comfortable with who I am. I would have liked to follow many from the beginning of the journey and that being the case I thought I should start mine from just that....the beginning. It took me a long time to get here but I am excited for what the future holds.


Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Maintenance by Cane

Yesterday was maintenance day and master had already let me know that this week all maintenance would be done via cane. Oh joy, something to look forward too.

We have had zero time alone and I don't see any in our near future so we would have to make due with parking at "our" place during lunch for maintenance sessions this week. Master picked me up from work and we chatted as he drove to the secluded spot, we held hands and talked about plans for this weekend the kids, work and things of that nature. Then he looked over at me and asked Are you prepared for what's coming little girl?

I am sure I made that pathetic face I always make when I know an intense session is coming and mumbled something about never truly being prepared for the cane. He stepped out of the car, opened the passenger side back door and pulled the cane out from under the back seat. Always prepared that man, I tell you. He patted the seat with it and I obediently climbed into the back so I could lay on my stomach as he stood outside the car. You can keep your underwear up today he said in a casual tone and I think I froze with shock and confusion, Maybe I should feel his head, perhaps he is not well, I refrained from asking why because I did not want to press my luck but I guess my stunned expression gave me away. Maintenance will be all on the thighs today, so just lay down and lift up your skirt and we'll be good to go. Why I foolishly asked not sure if I had done something to upset him. Because I feel like it,  you'll be fine, just lay down.

I laid across the back seat waiting for the first strike to fall on the back of my legs, I was worked up and I think shaking a little. Master took his time in between strikes. I am never sure which is easier to take; a series of quick strikes that are over and done with or a session like this one when he strikes hard but pauses in between. That pause can be brutal giving you time to really feel it but still knowing more are on the way. After a bout 10 strikes I found myself bucking up just a little and yes I was sobbing into the seat of the car. Master brought the cane down across both my checks and told me to be still, that my moving was annoying him. I calmed myself trying to mentally track how many strikes I had already received convincing myself it surely could not be much longer but when the next five landed in rapid succession the burning on the back of my legs was pretty intense and I turned on my side just a bit. Lay back down slave Master commanded gently. I am not sure what came over me but as I laid back flat on my stomach I reached my left hand back and grabbed Masters free hand for support. He squeezed my hand tight and rubbed his thim across my hand, whispering words of encouragement as he struck a few more times. Then he placed my hand back by my head so he could finish the job as I obediently laid still for the last of what was coming.  Finally I heard  him say OK you can get up now babe but instead I kind of curled up in a fetal position not really ready to move. He coaxed me up and into this arms and held, rocked and kissed me while I cried, telling me what a good girl I am and  how much he loves me. I thanked him for maintenance and crumbled into the safety of his arms. We sat and talked for the rest our lunch break (who needs food) and then he drove me back to the office. As we said goodbye he grabbed a fistful of my hair at the nape of my neck pulling my face under his and kissed me so deeply I wanted to melt into his body. As his lips departed from mine he held my head in place and firmly (but not painfully) gave me two quick face slaps on the right cheek and told me to be careful, to be a good girl, that he loved me and I should run along.

I floated through work the rest of my day, gently resting the back of my legs of my chair and making sure my dress was pulled down as low as possible since I could tell some of the welts were not to far above the back of my knee. I felt a sense of peace I had not really had in a while. I guess part of it was that the anticipation was over but knowing that I would be getting more of the same in less than 48 hours. Knowing that Master understands how much I crave to stay in that fully submissive/slavelike mindset even when I fight him on things.

I have an assigned mantra today: 

Anything you do should be approved by Master. Master can do anything he wants with and/or to you. You are owned by Master.

It's going to be a good day.

19 comments:

  1. I always wonder that too: Is it better when I get hard, fast spanks, or harder and time in between. But either way ouch!

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    1. Yep, ouch either way. I think its easier to be still when they are hard and fast but not sure if its better.

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    2. Yeah I think you are right, I can handle it better being still too I just tried that out last night actually. Although we don't do the cane, sounds really scary. But I am always happy when DH can let out his frustrations.

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  2. im not probably going to be too much help as i absolutley adore the cane lol its without a doubt my favourite implement.

    The cane is an implement that does tend to be feared and this is usually because of the images that are portrayed on spanking and bdsm sites of these really welted asses and they dont look appealing.

    The key in my opinion in managing the cane is a really good warm up beforehand which makes such a difference in how it feels, especially if its an implement that the dominant wants to use fairly often.

    Sounds like a yummy day to me.

    xxx

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    1. I actually really like the cane as well but I do get nervous about it beforehand and I never get warm ups, ever.

      I think I like the cane so much because I know how much it excites him to use it. I need him to get off my pain.

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  3. You are one tough lady - I hurt just thinking about your caning and then going back to work. WOW. You are a wonder.

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    1. I think I was more worried about people being able to tell I was crying then anything else. I don't like getting maintenance or being punished at lunch but we get so little time alone it's sometimes the only option. Me a tough lady, coming from the one who took 250 hits with the leather paddle and still didn't call halt.

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  4. I really like the cane. But, I still think about it a lot before the scene.

    I enjoyed your description of after care. That was awesome.

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    1. The after care was very nice, the cane is coming out again today and I am actually pretty Ok with it.

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  5. The cane in and of itself sounds challenging...but on the backs of the thighs only as well? You are made of tougher stuff than I, my friend! Sounds like it ended with you in a very good, peaceful place:)

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    1. After I read your post about the blind wand I wondered if they were actual pretty similar. I bet they are. My thighs are pretty bruised up, I am glad it has gotten chilly here because I cannot wear shorts right now.

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  6. I love/hate the cane. I love that the welts tend to stay with me for a while. I thought Master was tough with His maintenance...but can..on the thighs. I do not do well with thigh spankings....you did great. It's true for me too, if I can feel Him..His hand on me, it makes the staying in place easier.
    hugs abby

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    1. I like the marks the cane leaves. I have been getting a lot of thigh spankings lately, hopefully they wuill get a bit easier. Holding his hand made all the difference in the world.

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  7. The whole experience, his words, his actions, your responses sound wonderful. I am so thrilled for the progression of your relationship! :-)

    love, squirrel

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    1. Thanks squirrel, we have been though some tough times that I did not see a way out of but we seem to get through somehow.

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  8. Thighs! Owww.

    I like how he held your hand for support. That touch is so important sometimes.

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    1. Yes the touch really helped me stay calm, sometimes I think they don't get how much it helps. I was worried he was going to push my hand away so when he started rubbing his thumb across my head it was special.

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  9. Hi dancingbarez! I finally found a minute to come by and see you :) I've never felt a cane. I have to admit I'm a little afraid to! Sounds very painful, but maybe like a belt, it just depends on the intent behind it?! Like Susie, I love how he held your hand. That simple comfort really means a lot sometimes.

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    1. So glad you stopped by. I was terrified the first time we used the cane but it is something I have come to desire. I actually think the belt can be a bit worse depending on the swing and I love the belt. The hand holding was great.

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