The Beginning

There are so many wonderful blogs I have read and kept up with that gave me the strength to become comfortable with who I am. I would have liked to follow many from the beginning of the journey and that being the case I thought I should start mine from just that....the beginning. It took me a long time to get here but I am excited for what the future holds.

Thursday, February 28, 2013

Take my breath away...literally

Since recovering from my surgery a lot of our extracurricular activities had to be put on hold. Of course there is always Dominance and Submission because that's who we are but maintenance, discipline and  play all needed to either be put on hold altogether or adjusted to fit the current circumstance. Yes, Master has still been able to fist my hair and pinch my thighs and there were a few careful spankings thrown in the mix but well it has just been different.

Where there's a will, there's a way.

The other night we were cuddled in bed with my youngest daughter watching a kid movie. She was totally into what she was watching and was not paying any attention to us whatsoever. It felt great to be snuggled all into my Daddy's body as he held my throat while we watched TV. As per usual when we are lying together my gaze left the screen to stare at his features. This is something this slave could be content doing for hours and always brings with it a great sense of admiration, love and worship. Sometimes Daddy will ask what one is doing but others he doesn't acknowledge the staring which allows one to continue to her hearts content.

This evening though Daddy chose to move his hand from my throat and clasp my mouth shut while he used his other hand to pinch my nose. It was so sudden there was not time to even think about taking a deep breath of air first and eventually slaves body & brain started to involuntarily panic. It's such a weird sensation because there is nothing this man would do to ever hurt his girl in a "bad" way and yet the panic set in. Of course along with that panic came some other bodily reactions which left slave needing to change her bottoms once the movie was over.

Daddy continued to allow her to breathe and then cover her up several times throughout the evening. Sometimes it would be long enough that her head would start shaking side to side ever so slightly while struggling for air (but not enough for my daughter to realize we were not exactly watching the movie). Each time he held her head in a position so that we were making direct eye contact and it was apparent the panic and begging with my eyes was affecting him as well.

As slave snuggled even closer into Daddy panting and paying close attention to his movements in an attempt to figure out when to take the last big gulp of air before he grasped her again he whispered in her ear "I control that too" and it was music to this slaves ears.


  1. DH has been experimenting with holding controlling my breathing during worship sessions. It is something alright.

  2. Wow DB, sounds intense! There definitely are ways to keep the dymanic going despite physical limitations.


  3. Masters will always find a way to exert their control....sometimes a little creativity is in order! Looks like your Master is finding a way...:)
    hugs abby

  4. Glad you recovery is going well.

  5. Wow, you've been through a lot lately. Just catching up. Glad to read things have calmed and that you're recovering from your surgery.

    Dee x


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