The Beginning

There are so many wonderful blogs I have read and kept up with that gave me the strength to become comfortable with who I am. I would have liked to follow many from the beginning of the journey and that being the case I thought I should start mine from just that....the beginning. It took me a long time to get here but I am excited for what the future holds.


Friday, October 5, 2012

That’s not being a dominant

Yesterday we were sitting in the car talking and Daddy asked me about a little girl we drove to a sporting event as a favor last week.  
The girls seemed to get along well in the car last weekend; why doesn’t your daughter hang out with her anymore?
I explained that my daughter and this girl became very close friends two years ago in 2nd grade but after a while the friend started getting to possessive. Nobody else was allowed to play with or even talk to my daughter without this girl getting nasty to that other person and an argument with the girl trying to play with them would quickly ensue.  They would even push away my other daughter who is very close in age to my older daughter and they often have the same friends (that’s going to be fun when they start liking boys). She had to be touching my daughter and hanging all over her all the time to. Eventually nobody even tried to play with them anymore because they were so closely attached at the hip and closed off to anybody else. At first my daughter ate it up and she loved the attention. Her whole world revolved around only being with this friend, BUT after a while it was too much for my daughter and slowly but surely she wanted to talk to some of other friends and the friendship turned bad.
Daddy listened to me and then answered jokingly She must be a Dominant.
I took a minute to absorb the information then I answered That’s not being dominant, that’s being a suffocating ass.
Daddy didn’t say much after that.
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9 comments:

  1. JuliaOctober 5, 2012 at 3:22 PM

    I think that girl sounds way too needy!

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    1. dancingbarezOctober 5, 2012 at 3:45 PM

      It was a little much but right when I started getting really worried about it (about 6 months long) my daughter started distancing from her.

      Delete
  2. AnonymousOctober 5, 2012 at 3:41 PM

    So did the girls do the separating or did parents have to get involved? LOL Just wondering.

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    1. dancingbarezOctober 5, 2012 at 3:49 PM

      I think we were reading/commenting on each others blogs at the same time! We did try and talk to them about it at first but the more we brought it up the closer they became. Eventually my daughter figured it out on her own and started playng with her other friends again. It would be nice if they would play every once in a while but so far my daughter just does not want to be aruond her again.

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  3. AnonymousOctober 5, 2012 at 4:16 PM

    I agree that it is not healthy for youngsters or for TTWD relationships. I am glad that your daughter made the change in her life.

    Hug,
    joey

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  4. toriOctober 5, 2012 at 4:52 PM

    I do think its normal more so for girls than boys to build up these intense friendships however when it gets to the point its suffocating then yes it can be unhealthy......and i think this applies to all relationships regardless of the dynamic.

    xx

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  5. Aimless RamblingOctober 5, 2012 at 5:38 PM

    If the shoe fits...............

    Glad your daughter was able to see the problem and fix it by herself. Obviously, she had a very smart mom.

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  6. BasOctober 6, 2012 at 10:43 AM

    Good for your daughter. Smart girl.
    You're qualification about the other girl was right to the point.

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  7. AnonymousOctober 6, 2012 at 3:54 PM

    Beautifully said! And what a lovely job of parenting you did ~ those lessons you learn for yourself are always more powerful than something externally imposed.

    aisha

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